This I Believe

I Believe in Individuality

I once believed in catholic school uniforms: iron-pressed oxford shirts, thick cotton vests, plaid skirts that hung below the knees, and maroon socks that climbed up to them. I once believed that this was unity – that everyone who wore this outfit was one – together we stood in straight lines, together we sat in straight rows, and together we learned to walk the straight and narrow path of conformity.

I once believed in Jesus and conformity, not because it was my choice, but because I had been branded by my clothes. Every morning for 9 years of my catholic school life, my mother dressed me - like every other girl’s mother dressed her – in this uniform.

I remember on summer days when the sun shone through the windows on our covered bodies. We were all blazing; we were all suffering. One of those days, I decided that the unity of suffering was one that I wanted to forfeit. I decided to wear white socks. At first, I didn’t think much of this move, but as soon as I entered through the metal door I regretted my comfort. Without missing a beat, Sister Lisa marked me a traitor and sent me to the rectory to staple bulletins for Sunday’s Mass. Once again my clothing had branded me. This time I was forced to suffer Alone.

Most children are afraid of the word and the reality of Alone. I was one of those children until my sentence of paper and staples. I realized that alone time gave me a chance to think, a chance to form ideas about things that most catholic-born children rarely think about. I savored every inch of time between fingers and stapler, between paper and staple. This lonely sentence now forms the paragraphs of my belief.

I’m not sure Sister Lisa realized my reason for thin white socks. Stapling bulletins in a small air-conditioned room was not the most effective punishment for a 6th grade girl who just wanted to keep cool. I look back on this moment and chuckle at the irony. I had won. while everyone suffered May’s wrathful sun, I stapled papers in a lovely and artificial winter wonderland.

I once believed that conformity and oneness was for everyone. I once believed in Jesus and Sunday Mass and alter serving and Parish picnics and Reconciliation once a month. I also believed that leaders had to be older and wiser, but now I believe that they are rarely both.

I believe now that the sun shines on those who follow others and their rules, but I also believe that it can burn them. I shy away from the flaming sun. I am December’s child. I yearn for the touch of snow.

St. Veronica (an original song)

A Modest Proposal

To ensure the highest quality of life to all Americans

We are all very much aware of the state of our country. Most of the working class citizens of the United States – myself included – sit idly and wait for the President to do his job and rescue us from our imminent demise. But I have recently learned of a secret that I shall share with my audience: the President is only human. Therefore, I step up from my position as also and equally human and take on the task of creating a solution.

In spite of – or because of – the withering economy, the high costs of peaceful breathing and few hours of good night’s sleep, I propose some change. Because of the frightening ratio of dead men to working men, the percentage of sleep-aids increasing, the equally terrifying ratio of tire swings to nooses, the images of little boys and girls with bruises, I propose some change. Because I am human and you are human and he and she and we ALL are humans,

I

propose this change. I know that the state we, as a nation, are in is one that can not be easily contained and exterminated, but upon studying the various ways past leaders have organized our land, I have come up with a theory that should not and will not be dismissed. Instead, it will be remembered for its salvation, its prosperity, and its practicality.

Without further ado, I humbly propose – with this nation’s wellbeing in mind – that we pixelize our lives. And despite the expensive language previously employed, I mean this literally.

It is my contention that the only way to live our lives would be to do so online. Human interaction has only proven to be dangerous and destructive; the only way to rid ourselves of these – go straight to the source.

I propose that every man, woman, and child over the age of 6 creates a pseudonym online. Attached to this name will be the following: an avatar, a profile, a virtual town that one lives in, a vehicle of one’s choice (of course children receive bicycles or scooters), a bank account based on points, and finally, the universal instant messaging system AIM. All of these shall be used instead of real names, real towns, real vehicles, real currency, and telephones.

If you are not yet convinced to my position, I present to you a few benefits of my plan:

1. Freedom from Currency. No longer will money rule us; we shall salvage the little bit of sanity left from this recession and finally let go of ALL currency. The dollar will be a souvenir from the past and we will worship the Bank of Kudos, where points are received and deducted for everyday activities and crimes. If you mow your e-lawn – plus 4 points. If you pummel your e-wife – minus 1 point. These points can be used anywhere such as e-Burger Kings, e-universities, e-zoos, and even! e-Pleasure Chests.

2. Freedom of Leisure. No longer will careers monopolize our time; we shall remove all jobs and level the playing field. The wealthy, the poor, the students, the homeless will ALL be unemployed. As previously stated, money will no longer depend on the profession but on the heart and actions; therefore, jobs will be of no importance. Stay-at-home will be every human beings title! Imagine all the time one can spend in the comfort of home.

3. Freedom from Waiting. Right now, online purchases take days, even weeks, to be delivered. Pixelizing America will insure that everything solid is transported through TVwaves into your very own home within a matter of seconds. Not only will you stay at home, but everything will come right through your computer screen.

4. Freedom from Generational Boundaries. In E-merica, economic duties can be completed by anyone, even children. This in and of itself will elevate the importance of raising children. Bratty little ones will punish the whole family and reduce their weekly point-income. Parents will not only have more time to raise their children, but the motivation to do so as well.

5. Freedom of AND from Relationships. Online relationships are the solution for so many of our problems. No longer will boyfriends complain that their girls are smothering them; arguments will be fought with words only – no domestic violence; teenagers will be safe from sexual predators and even! that innumerable list of sexually transmitted infections and diseases.

This is but a short list I have compiled of the benefits of pixelizing America. But as you can imagine, there is much to gain from online existence. (The full list that I have gathered can be found on my personal blog in a pdf file.)¹

Of course, as a 21st century being, I recognize that some may argue that this proposal eliminates something very important to Americans today: the orgasm and procreation. Lest you forget, I shall remind you now of masturbatory practices and e-sperm banks. So consider this modest proposal and remember that

the future of E-merica is in your hands.




¹www.theE-mericanDream.blogspot.com

Brave New World vs. Today

Both Huxley and Orwell present surprisingly accurate, if not, interesting predictions about the future of society. Connection to Orwell's 1984 can be made: surveillance cameras, Internet databases, microchip implants and other technologies can clearly be seen as a manifestation of Big Brother, and Room 101 can be tied to both torture or even more simply to interrogations. Although Orwell's future is more lauded today, Huxley's vision in Brave New World is more relevant - almost too relevant - leaning more towards eerie than just coincidental.

The life of a World State citizen begins in a bottle. In this bottle, they are conditioned through the appropriate dosage of oxygen, alcohol and other substances to become whatever society needs them to be. Upon being "decanted" - the equivalent of our word "born" - he goes through the appropriate series of hypnopaedic and experimental conditioning that feeds and creates his personality; he never gets the chance to choose his own path; he is conditioned from his birth until his death. Although this method of creating people seems too unnatural, far-fetched and even irrelevant to today's society, it isn't.

Currently we have many "unnatural" means of fertilization such as In Vitro and artificial insemination. Scientists are even going as far as genetic engineering, where they can increase the chances of having a child with a specific eye/hair color. Genetic engineering is one way of conditioning, but how about a pregnant woman playing Mozart to her unborn child, a mother or father forcing their child to use their right instead of their left hand to write/eat/play baseball, or even the vaccinations we get growing up? These are all things people do to try to change their children. Some of the methods are unproven and others don't work 100% of the time, but even merely attempting change is enough proof to connect our society to that of Brave New World. What began with Pavlov's dogs expanded to many other scientific and personal experiments dealing with conditioning; this change can be seen in human conditioning as well. All of this was unheard of in the past, but scientific advancements proved to change the way babies are brought into the world, to change how society works.

Another way the citizens of World State are controlled is psychologically through their superiors and their peers. Although the human body is controlled through conditioning at birth and childhood, human nature in general remains relatively untouched. The characters in Brave New World are still compelled to conform if it gives them the acceptance that they long for. This universal feeling is used to the society's advantage and they create a "surveillance system" based on paranoia. When everyone is watching everyone else the need to conform becomes more important. We see its effect through characters like Bernard and Lenina. Lenina's friend Fanny constantly keeps her on the right path and steers her to accept more dates and advances from men because the Director would be unhappy if she didn't follow "Everyone belongs to everyone else." Even Bernard, the outcast of World State, knows to conform during the meetings and other aspects of life in the eyes of his fellow World Statians. Peers and authority figures constantly keep the citizens in line and following the structure of society.

This type of surveillance through paranoia seems almost more effective then Orwell's Big Brother and even more relevant to the present. In present day society, people are always looking for approval. Social standards are set and spread through the media and this alone keeps our people in line. Whether it be shopping for the latest fashion trend, going "Green," or listening to popular radio stations, presently, people look for ways to conform and to fit in among their peers. Everyone has their social groups and work groups in which they fit perfectly like puzzle pieces. These current groups are Huxley's own Epsilons, Alphas, Betas, etc.


Although Brave New World may seem preposterous to us, it is quite the mirror image of today's society. Keeping in mind the progress that science has made from the Scientific Revolution, to Pavlov, to test tube babies, it would not be an outrageous assumption to say that by connecting personal interest with those of scientists and society in general there is the possibility of achieving a world close to, if not identical to World State.

Arguement

Consider the likelihood of the following scenario:

You are twenty-five years old: college medical student by day, in search of a job by night. It's Friday morning - the very beginning of a productive weekend - and you have a job interview at St. Jude's Children's Hospital. You are nervous, excited, perhaps a little nauseous as you step inside the building. You feel small as the walls envelope you. You feel big in your brand new suit, ready to take on the harsh reality of suffering and sorrow, or so you think. The interview goes less than smoothly when your now not-so-potential boss calls you out on using a few too many fallacies in your discourse. Pale from embarrassment you slouch in your chair and hope for invisibility; intentions were good but perhaps relying on sentimentality is not the way to go. Your interviewer shakes your hand and says, We'll call, but you think in your head, You won't. A last minute question is asked, last chance to regain some dignity. Somehow, you say the right thing. Your brain spills some answer about the regeneration of cells in the human body and you're in. He hires you on the spot, gives you a position you weren't even applying for, a much better position than the one you were applying for. You think to yourself, If it wasn't for that four years of gym in high school I would have never gotten my dream job.

Many of the events created in the above scenario are quite plausible. I'm sure somewhere there must have been a med student - perhaps not exactly 25 years old - applying for a job at some well known and influential hospital. Perhaps their interview didn't go well, not all do. Perhaps there was one redeeming question that caused them to get their job. the probability of this is low, but it is not a complete stretch. The overstretching occurs in the last sentence. How possible is it that someone will utter those words after high school? How relevant is Physical Education to its students' futures? Does it serve a purpose besides being a 40 minute slot filler? In most cases, the answers to these questions are negative. Because most students learn absolutely nothing of use in gym class,they should not be required to take all four years of Physical Education in high school.

Gym class is, in all honesty, a joke. Students walk into the locker rooms, most of them late, and if they are there before the bell, they take their time getting changed. Eventually, the teacher is fed up with waiting, marches in and herds them out. Amount of time wasted: approximately 6 minutes. As soon as all (or most of) the students gather in the designated area of their class, the teacher stumbles through the process of attendance. The class is dispersed. Girls are standing around talking about the latest gossip or the latest test they bombed. No one is where they are assigned to be. Teacher does nothing to direct or discipline them. Amount of time wasted: approximately 5 minutes. Finally, the class begins. The teacher attempts to achieve full participation in warm ups. Participation usually reaches a high of 5 out of 40 students actually trying. Amount of time wasted: about 9 minutes. Before you know it, you have 20 minutes left in the period, not including the time you need to change back into your regular school clothes. You have worked out enough to break a sweat, but that's about it. If gym classes were organized more efficiently and had a more rigorous curriculum more students would at least be able to appreciate and understand the reason behind the class.

Because the classes are run the way they are, students view gym negatively and perhaps may take it a step further and view all types of exercise negatively. If one does not have experience in team sports and/or individual activities it is easy to get the wrong impression of this concept. Even the ones that do participate in sports find gym to be a waste of time, especially because they have an idea of what real exercise is and how it is achieved. Would it not, then, be a wise decision to allow students to opt out of a gym class for perhaps, an AP class they've always wanted to take but could never fit into the schedule, an elective that will challenge them intellectually or creatively, even a Study Hall to get some work done.

Education is meant to prepare students for their aspirations. Perhaps my earlier scenario could be true if the man were to say he learned the information thanks to AP Biology. We'll never really know. It is easy to create scenarios and manipulate them to prove a point. But as a high school senior, taking her fourth year of gym, I can confidently say that the other evidence speaks for itself. The idea of physical education is appealing and reasonable, but its application in the school system is less than desirable. Students should have the option of taking other, more challenging classes instead of gym. Give us knowledge or give us death!

Happy Ice Day!

i want to be like this:

Last minute Christmas preparations

I'm a procrastinator in every sense of the word. I even put off buying, wrapping, giving gifts. Instead, I went out in the snow yesterday. I tried to build an igloo; the snow was too fluffy. I tried to make a snow angel; I stepped in and ruined its shape. I tried to chase my dog; I fell on my knees into the cold and stayed there for longer than I thought comfortable. The holiday season just puts me in a leisurely mood which creates my leisurely pace. I slowly begin preparing for Christmas at the beginning of December, miscalculating, always, how much time I have. Christmas never seems to be near until it actually is. Then all chaos erupts and I'm left blogging about my own personal downfall: procrastination.